Merry Go Round!

This one is a filthy one. Or rather about one.

One would think that BMC would maintain the premises surrounding their waste management office, and make it an example. But no Sir, they don’t believe in setting examples. Just check out the photos. These either surround this office or are about 100 metres from it. Not only are these nor swept for years, but nothing has been done to prevent encroachment by builders.

I tried to bring this to the notice of the Clean Up team. Here is what I did –

ROUND 1. I wrote to the Additional Commissioner – this mail was answered by someone from United Way, an audit agency. Don’t know whether the Additional Commissioner is even aware of such a mail being written. Nevertheless, I followed up with the agency on mail and phone, which is about 2 weeks now. They have been responsive, but have not been able to find a solution. They gave me numbers of some clean up marshals for the ward.

ROUND 2. I called up the Clean Up Marshals who control this area and fixed a meeting. I met them and they saw the area. Surprisingly, they informed me that they are only empowered to fine, that too when they catch someone and that they will not be able to get the road cleaned! They told me that I need to see the JO in the Solid Waste Management Department.

ROUND 3. I visited the SWM office and met the concerned person, one Mr. Acharekar. Mr. Acharekar had a fantastic observation when questioned why the road was not being maintained. He washed his hands off saying that the road did not even belong to the BMC!!! When I pointed out that BMC had installed street lights here, he said that the road has not been handed over to him by the BMC! Wow man, a BMC officer saying this!!!

Pathetic. Roadblock now. Anyways, I have put in a complaint on the BMC website and wait!!! So much for being a vigilant citizen.

Aman Ki Asha – WTF?

What does the Times of India really want to achieve through the “Aman ki Asha” initiative? Beats me. It is rather silly that the newspaper which claims to be India’s best and biggest, does not understand that getting a bunch of artists, cricketers and page 3 people will not solve any issue. Yes, we want peace, but one has to get realistic.

The issues do not lie with the people. The “aam” aadmi does not care about the peace with Pakistan, he worries about his next meal. He does not care about the ghazal singer from Karachi, he wonders about why is Ajmal Kasab still alive. The real issues are on the political front. No amount of people’s movement, if that ever happens, will serve any purpose towards peace. Yes, The “Times of India” can vie for another award (in journalism or social advertising), like they did with Lead India and the Teach India campaigns. But even the campaign looks unconvincing, defensive, and non committal in its targets.

Many issues remain unanswered. Should we forget and move on? What does TOI have to say about the firing across the border which occurs almost everyday? And what about the likes of Sarabjeet? And will it get the Jang Group to pressurise the Pakistani government to finally come clean and accept the attack on Mumbai?

Wet dreams, TOI. “Aman ki Asha” just feels good, doesn’t achieve anything. And yes, it soils you.

Awards!

I love awards. Totally, and absolutely. I would be lying if I say that awards don’t mean a thing to me. I love to stand there on stage, taking my little token /trophy /certificate anything that pats me on the back and can then adorn my shelf! I love the recognition that come with it, and the glory that I love to bask in. It’s fantastic. It motivates, invigorates, and pushes me to do better.

 

In school, I always wanted to be the one going up on the dias and taking any award. But there was too much competition then. In college, I kind of lost out, with my focus being on other things. And then, with work life in Mumbai, I am discovering the ways of getting recognition. Three in the last one year. Makes me feel good. Very very good. I hope this goes on, he he he…..

 

And now, I somehow find myself enjoying the glory that Slumdog Millionaire has got. I have not seen the movie, nor do I find it compelling to do so. Maybe one day I will. Maybe I won’t. But, it’s good to know that it is a product that most people love. Yes, it’s not an Indian movie, it’s only about India. Only? That’s one word to be used carefully. Anyways, there are people who say that the Oscars are not the greatest recognition for Indian artistes. But my dear friend, it is recognition. And, on a global scale. Its an award, that some Indians got NOT because they were in the “foreign film” category. It’s a recognition of their talent on the global network.

 

Jai Ho!

Childhood

Why is that when we are children and in school, we want to grow up in a hurry? And why is it that once we grow up, we want to be children again?

Got this fantastic poem as a forward (it’s in marathi, but the true essence is only felt in one’s mother tongue, and translating this will be a crime!). It is so true for my days in Pune, and which I sitting here in Mumbai, miss terribly.

Mumbai Terror Attack

Today was another one of those that brought the Mumbai to a standstill. The city was under attack by some terrorists and the citizens in shock, anger, disgust, fear, tears, and a whole variety of inexplicable emotions. It’s again that a handful of armed militants have held people’s lives and their security at ransom.

Confusion reigned from Wednesday night itself. THe seriousness of the whole orchestrated attack was evident only after a couple of hours at around 11pm. SMSes started doing the rounds, TV channels screamed images of violence and panic and a whole lot of ambiguity was being caused. When morning arrived, the first pictures that one saw on TV was that of the Taj Mahal Hotel being on fire, some military forces trying to bring the situation under control. While schools and colleges were declared closed, there was whole sale confusion amongst people whether or not to go to work. I guess around 11.30 most people would have given up any thoughts to get to work, a decision maybe a concoction between their own concerns, panic and the sentiment being echoed by other colleagues or friends.

Our police and miltary forces are doing a fatastic job of keeping the situation under check and control. Brilliant officers have laid down their lives for our security, going down all guns blazing. As of now, the attack is still not over and we Mumbaikars sincerely hope that this reign of terror is quickly over.

Deshdrohi

KRK – Kamal Rashid Khan is here with a mission. His acting launch pad Deshdrohi is hitting screens on November 14 competing with Dostana. The publicity for Deshdrohi is no less than it was for Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak, which was a launch pad Aamir Khan. In fact, Himesh Reshammiya can take a tip or two here, Karzzzz publicity was nothing compared to this. 

 

Sample this. Kamal Rashid Khan is everywhere. I switch on the TV to watch cricket, I see him. I watch a news channel, I see him. He is definitely on all music channels and all entertainment channels. He is out on the hoardings and I can’t miss him when I am driving. I try and hide in the safety of mall, and I see OOH media screens with KRK! Worse, he follows me to work on the screens in my cafeteria.  I give up. The man is unstoppable!

 

Deshdrohi is a topical film based on the current migrant situation in Mumbai. Serious agenda, but I guess watching the promos make me feel that this is going to turn out to be a laugh riot. His clothes could probably set a new fashion trend, those leather jackets and all… His gun skills are going to be the journals of reference for generations to come. And KRK’s dialogue delivery is icy cold; it can freeze tiger’s blood! We have been fortunate to catch some of his gems on TV. I am sure the action is going to be awe inspiring. The glam quotient is high with Gracy Singh (who started her career with Aamir Khan in Lagaan, followed it up with Sanjay Dutt in Munnabhai MBBS and Ajay Devgan in Gangajal), playing the romantic lead, from what I hear. And not to miss some sizzling item numbers by Kim Sharma and Saif fame Rozza.

 

Issme action hai, drama hai, romaans hai, tragedy hain aur haan, bhaiyyo aur beheno, issme comedy bhi hai (which I am sure is not intentional!!). Aaiye, dekhiye, ek laakhon mein ek samajik sachchaiyo par adharit filum, jo aapko sochne par majboor karegi. What sochna, we don’t know. To each is own like KRK!!!

Mee aahe marathi manoos…

“You are Marathi?”. Yessir, mee aahe marathi manoos.

 

I could sell ice to an eskimo, but may find it tough when it comes to convincing people that I am a marathi manoos. I get passed off as a relocated keralaite, a gaothan catholic, or a nice telugu. Or sometimes as an alien.

 

Reason 1 – My diction. Not really the way Mumbaikars speak nor the way Punekars speak. My accent is a hybrid between the Pune and Nagpur styles. The old worldly style of Pune and the north influenced Nagpuri style combine strategically to ensure that I can never express myself clearly in Marathi.  

 

Reason 2 – My looks. For all to see. I look like an import from some hypothetical fairy land. Deep eyes (yup, sunk into my eye sockets!), my colour (can easily comouflage as a zebra, thanks Dad, Mom for the stripes!), my structure (as regal as the royalty of some food starved country!).

 

Reason 3 – My name. The biggest drawback is the serious lack of “kar” in my name. With a surname like this, I pass of as an ancient Maori tribesman than a inhabitant of the Deccan Plateau.

 

But at the core, I am as marathi as I can be. I always refer to Kaalnirnay, I try and read some Diwali “ank“, I sit on the katta with friends when I am in Pune, use words like “chya aila“, I wear a Gandhi topi for Satya Nararayan puja, I say “Deva Ishwara Parameshwara Panduranga” to sigh, I still love Chimnarao, I have been saying Mumbai even when it was Bombay, I love Chitale’s chirote, and the Lonavala chikki. I still call people “bandya” or “balu“. And in this day and age when parents talk to their child only in English, my wife and I always speak to our daughter in Marathi. Like mine, her sanskaar will always be true marathi!

More than pictures…

Some pictures mean more than they say! These are random shots that I have collected from various places. Am not a photographer – but am sure you can see the depth in these pictures!!!

A New Beginning – This was taken one fine morning at the Food Mall on the Mumbai Pune Expressway at 6 am. The sun had just lit up the sky, while the solitary lamp post seems to be looking at in awe, wondering if it could ever manage this magic!!!

Light-up-the-sky!

Land’s End? – Taken from atop the Chapora Fort in Goa, this breathtaking picture is more than a shoreline. It’s a reminder of what the planet was before we starting killing it bit by bit. How soon before the end?

Phir Milenge! – The sunset. This painting on God’s canvass is the most tranquil scenes that I have ever seen. When was the last time you felt peace?

See ya, tomorrow!

Waterworld! – Nature’s temper tantrum in Mumbai. That’s abour 5 feet of water in my building!

Where

Life is full of choices – It’s the choices you make that truly define you. Just like this wall. Elegant, Beautiful, Solid, Fighter. Never give in, never give up!

Carved in stone!

Love Love Love

With the redevelopment of older buildings in my neighbourhood is gathering speed and with lesser people now populating the area, I am noticing a new development also happening. In a space starved Mumbai, couples find all sorts of places to koo-chickoo!!! One such place happens to be a corner of my building, which after nightfall provides a safe haven for love birds to flock.

 

With no watchmen to shoo them away, our cars and bikes provide seclusion and shield them from the prying eyes of the world. The solitary tube light entrusted with the task of spreading light to the environs of this particular corner somehow now supports these couples, refusing to come out of its slumber, thus providing the cover of darkness as encouragement. Everyday, when I get back from work, I see some couple or the other utilising the facilities which we have benevolently provided. Some are also playing soulful numbers by Himesssss, or Atif Aslam to create the mood. Kehte hain, paani aur sacche pyaar ko koi rok nahin sakta.  

 

I am reminded of my childhood days when we used to visit the lush green environs of Empress Garden. Empress Garden – Pune – is a botanical park with a huge cover of greenery sprawling over a huge area. There also happens to be a small stream flowing through it adding to the charms. We used to go there on Sundays to generally have a good time lazing around playing cricket and badminton or just running around through the stream. This place is also full of huge trees, as also bamboo groves. Every tree had at least two lovelorn couples “engaged” in affection. Bamboo grooves were even better. These were a perfect camouflage for snakes and couples alike, all of whom used to have intertwined bodies. We innocent minds never understood why people had to hide and talk to each other. Since we were fed on a diet of hindi movies, we thought that love was all about singing songs in the garden around trees. So we used to wait for these people to start singing. But alas!

 

Anywhichways, we soon understood why these guys did so. When we started going to college, we were exposed to many such couples canoodling around. And that too in college since our college – Fergusson – was blessed with plenty of isolated spots which did not remain all that isolated with the ever growing love industry.

 

And the more adventurous ones and of course the innovative ones used to pick up places such as the Lovers’ Lane. This was a lane that connects Law college road to somewhere inside and runs parallel to Prabhat road (for the guys from Pune, if u wanna ever use this!). And yes, there was this amazing technique. You hire a rick. And you pay that guy some money to park the rick very close to the dense growth of trees in someone’s bungalow. And use the rain curtain on the other side. And yippee, you had a private room to yourselves.

 

In Mumbai, though since trees and gardens a rarity, in addition to the spots like my building couples stick to Bandstand, Worli seaface, Nariman Point, Marine Drive and some other places where there is a potent combination of the sea and rocks! It’s very easy to sea that they have a rocking time!!!

Traffic ecosystem in Mumbai

Anyone who drives a car in Mumbai needs to know the pecking order on the roads. As I moved up the vehicle ranks, I realised that I have fallen lower in the traffic food chain. There were times when I was the King, oh how I have fallen!!!

To quote a famous Amitabh Bachchan dialogue from Agneepath “Kehne ko toh yeh shehar hai, par yahaan jungle ka kanoon chalta hai. Yahaan par har taqatwar apne se kum taqatwar ko kha jaata hai.”(Roughly translated: “This may be a city, but ruled by the laws of the jungle. Every strong species eliminates the lesser species here.”)

Here’s how it looks like on the Mumbai roads – 

 

Traffic ecosystem on Mumbai roads

Pedestrians: These species is highly evolved. We walk therefore you are, seems to be their motto. Footpaths or no footpaths, these kings have to walk on the road. Vehicles have brakes, this species doesn’t. Red light, green light, no problem, we walk, jump, squeeze through.
Be wary of: Their limbs and their mouth. Limbs can be used for varied intimidating gestures and also cause damage to the vehicles of lower species. The mouth can be used for noises, usually provoking the lower species into confrontation.

Bikers: These are the leftists, zoom with gay abandon with no regard whatsoever for the others around. High speed starts; cutting lanes etc. is the basic character.
Be wary of: The middle finger and tough glares at other species. Occasional damage can be caused to others vehicles.

Rickshaws and Taxis: While these are the pests of the traffic ecosystem, their sheer numbers places them on higher in the ecosystem. Known for blocking lanes, slow take offs, stopping in the middle of the road and squeezing into every possible gap between anything. Another inherent trait is stopping anywhere in traffic without fore warning.
Be wary of: Causing damage by their noses, which seem to be getting into everywhere!

BEST buses: Were known to be disciplined species but increasingly getting dangerous. All species irrespective of their order are prone to damage from these. Coupled with their size, their scant respect for the lane system can be intimidating for all species.
Be wary of: Don’t get in their way unless you are a pedestrian!

Private cars: The lowest in the traffic ecosystem with stray incidents of notoriety. They are the receiving lot of all. Pedestrians block their way and cause damage if they try to move at any speeds above 2 km/hr which of course is dictated by the rickshaws and taxis, with their dangerous lane cuttings and also by the BEST buses which does not allow them any space to manoeuvre unless they scrape some part of their body somewhere. The private cars themselves show affection to each other with the side mirrors kissing each  other at regular intervals.
Be wary of: High speeds when attained late at night can cause the driver to be reckless!